His Power
You guys, it’s an absolute miracle. I am actually blogging… for the first time… in OVER a year. (Quite embarrassing when I realized I didn’t get a single one out in 2021! Oops!)
I know the chaos of the last few years has affected us all in different ways, but there is nothing like the evidence of your passions (or lack there of in my case) to show you how much it really did impact you. To tell you the truth, between the launch of my book and having two toddlers home all day during most of 2020, I think I used 2021 as a recovery year. A year of just putting one foot in front of the other… and a year of praying that school wouldn’t shut down again. ;)
But I’m back, baby! Or at least, I am for the here and now ha. I make no promises, but when the Lord speaks, I will listen, and that is where I am today.
Per usual, I was brought to absolute humility in a parenting moment this weekend. And along with that, as usual, we were in a hurry trying to get out the door for church. One of the great joys of being a pastor’s wife is getting myself and the kiddos up and out to church on my own every Sunday. Single parents, you are truly the unsung heroes.
But back to the point, a few things that have become far too regular and caused some chaos in our mornings:
Sleepy, preggo mama has been pressing snooze a few too many times and is running behind.
A slightly dramatic older sister has been sensitive to even the wind blowing the wrong way, let alone mom or sister not fitting into the mold she desires at the moment.
And an extremely funny younger sister has learned what makes said older sister tip over the edge and likes to take advantage.
All in all, a recipe for disaster. Especially when our peace saving daddy is already gone and all you’ve got is estrogen on top of estrogen running the house.
So after the millionth sister fight of the morning and finally getting them in the car (late), I pressed shuffle on a worship playlist so I could try and find the slightest resemblance of peace before walking into church. I soaked in these words as we slightly sped off to church.
Cause I see You taking ground
Oh, I see You press ahead
And your power is dangerous to the enemy’s camp
You still do miracles
And you will do what You said
For You’re the same God now as You’ve always been
-That’s The Power by Hillsong Worship
The conversation that followed should have been recorded so I could laugh at myself later:
“Girls, do you hear that enemy he mentioned? Who is that?”
“Satan!”
“When you girls are mean to each other, who is tricking you?”
“Satan!”
“But who has the power to transform us?”
“Jesus!”
“Who has already won?”
“Jesus!”
Then we proceeded to spend the remainder of the car ride singing these lyrics and laughing together. We were able to go into church with smiles on our faces, while subconsciously I’m patting myself on the back for my big parenting win.
It wasn’t until our worship team actually led this exact same song at the end of our service that I felt the Lord so kindly speaking to me.
“And that's the power of Your name
Just a mention makes a way
Giants fall and strongholds break and there is healing
Oh, that's the power that I claim
It's the same that rolled the grave
There's no power like the mighty name of Jesus”
-That’s the Power by Hillsong Worship
Oh Jesus, Your name is the only true power. Some giants in my life have been so easily identified (forgiveness, the diagnosis, fear, etc) but it’s the everyday sneaky ones that usually get away from me.
The need for control and order.
The need for children that obey.
(The need for sympathy for my difficult mornings. ;))
Order and obeying children are not bad things in the slightest. But it’s the why in my heart’s desire that gets me every. single. time. If I’m honest, I want it because it makes MY life easier. It makes MY mood lighter. It determines if I’m going to have a happy day or a “my life is so exhausting” day. And those are the giants and strongholds that are so sly in my thought life.
Do you have those? The things in your life that you (sometimes unknowingly) allow to take control of your thoughts and emotions? Maybe it’s the big obvious obstacles or maybe it’s the usual daily choices…
If I get that job…
If I looked a certain way…
If I find THE one…
If my parents only understood…
If I finally get pregnant…
If if if…
THEN I’ll be happy. Then everything will be right. Then I’ll be satisfied. THEN I’ll be content.
But we know the truth. I needed to be hit over the head with it in a worship service to be reminded, but thank goodness I was and maybe you need that reminder too.
There is only ONE that brings true fulfillment and we only find it when we call on the power in HIS name.
JESUS.
You alone can satisfy, Lord! Not my children’s behavior or anything else I’ve given a higher power to in my life. ONLY YOU.
For the month of January I read a Proverbs a day (highly recommend - especially for those 31 day months!) and I was reminded of this verse:
“Blessed is the one who always trembles before God,
but whoever hardens their hearts falls into trouble.”
-Proverbs 28:14
Father, give me a heart that is always soft and moldable to your instruction and your will! I know I harden myself when I give more power to my thoughts and ways than I do to the power of your name. But time and time again you are gracious. Thank you for always bringing me back (subtly or not) and reminding me of how much greater is your love, grace, and power! You alone bring true joy no matter my current circumstances, Father, and what a gift that joy is!
Praying that for myself and any of you that might find yourself struggling with the same thing today. It is always my hope and prayer that sharing the Lord’s teachable moments in my life would encourage you.
Your desires are not always wrong. But we must remember the only One that brings the hope and fulfillment to the deepest requests of our heart. And we must learn to lean on Him instead of ourselves!
Even in my darkest and most difficult seasons, He holds a perfect record in giving me more than I could ever imagine or thought I wanted. ;) I know He will for you too.
